Reviews
Children Of Bodom: Blooddrunk
27/03/08 || Euthanatos
Oh, God, I can’t believe I’m reviewing this. To be completely sincere, I actually really dig CoB’s first two albums. But everything after that went to shit. Complete shit. A good song here and there in “Follow the Reaper”. Then a world of feces in “Hate Crew BlaBla” and “Are You Dead Yet”, which may have been the gayest album title ever. So what does “Blooddrunk” bring forth? A righteous return to the path once trodden? My balls. It brings the same filler bullshit we’ve been having for the last decade. Seriously, how the fuck can you make awesome albums and then simply forget how to write a decent riff? I remember Alexi Laiho being hailed as a prime guitar player, a man with memorable solos, the Randy Rhoads of the 21st century. If I have to stomach one more of his solos, I’ll hurl blood chunks.
I can’t fucking stand these gay-ass keyboards anymore either. While they were fucking tense and atmosphere setting in the first two albums, now they’re fucking Stratovarius fruity, god damn it, Warman, give me something that chills my bones, not this fairy crap. Drums are good, yeah, yeah, double bass forevermore, doesn’t make much difference when all the songs sound the same, does it? I can never really hear the bass, so what’s left? Just the same old rant.
I can go on, would you like me to?
Every song is the fucking same thing, over and over again and it feels like I’ve died and went to hell. My punishment for my years and years of Satan worshipping, metal listening and anal raping is having to suffer through the same tunes for eternity.
Generic riff. Aggressive vocals. Backing vocal shouts. A guitar solo. A keyboard solo. Repeat.
Okay, granted, this shit brick isn’t as bad as the two previous albums, which were really, REALLY bad. No, this actually has glimpses, but only that, MERE GLIMPSES of Alexi’s long lost creativity. Maybe he should bring back Sinergy. Maybe Alexi should just call it a day with CoB and do the W.A.S.P. like album that we all know he’s dying to do. Anything but this. Don’t even get me started on song titles and lyrics. You’d think that after so many years Laiho would have some grasp of the english language. Nope. Still the same 5 year old retarded bullshit. “One Day You Will Cry”? “Smile Pretty for the Devil”? Are you fucking kidding me?
I’m really not going to recommend any songs, because they all sound the same. So, sure, if you think Children of Bodom have evolved through the years, getting progressively better, by all means, buy this, coat yourself in peanut butter and honey, and beat off to “Blooddrunk”. If you have any fucking common sense, go listen to Suffocation or something.
The cover: The reaper ripping through reality. Scary.
4 blooddrunk my ass out of 10.
- Information
- Released: 2008
- Label: Spinefarm
- Website: www.cobhc.com
- Band
- Alexi Laiho: vocals, lead guitar
- Roope Latvala: rhythm guitar
- Janne Warman: keyboards
- Henkka Seppälä: bass
- Jaska Raatikainen: drums
- Tracklist
- 01. Hellhounds on My Trail
- 02. Blooddrunk
- 03. LoBodomy
- 04. One Day You Will Cry
- 05. Smile Pretty for the Devil
- 06. Tie My Rope
- 07. Done With Everything, Die for Nothing
- 08. Banned from Heaven
- 09. Roadkill Morning
